Libertarisme volgens de Encyclopedia Dramatica

[Dope]

http://encyclopediadramatica.com/Libertarianism

Libertarianism is a fad political ideology for 13 year old boys. Libertarians, more commonly known as Libertaritards or Lolbertarians, believe that governmental involvement in peoples' lives should be limited as much as possible so libertarians can fuck dogs without being jailed on sodomy laws. They also believe roads and civic infrastructure are naturally occuring phenomena.

Libertarianism has a big crossover with Extropians and Trans-humanists, who think that you can realize science fiction ideas like space elevators and self genetic engineering in the near future. Most Libertarians are either 13 year old boys, fratboys who watch South Park, people that want to appear "alternative", or paranoid survivalists living in tiny cabins in Montana, where they stockpile weapons and food for the dreaded day when Big Brother comes 'round tryin' to implant fail chips in their brains.

The creation of a Libertarian

They start off as spoiled upper-middle class teens who, for being mildly autistic and holding their rich dads cock too tight for too long, never managed to develop any social skills or sense of humor above that of a boy who’ve just reached puberty. In frustration over their life being a complete failure, they join up on the internet with equally pathetic souls in their very special teenage rebellion trend exclusive for IRL bottom-feeders: Downloading south park episodes, agree with everything the show preaches then cry and masturbate each other how PC the rest of the world is, which effectively fulfills all the pubertal asspie desires of angsty rich kids.

List of Things Libertarians Believe In

1. All authority figures are good unless they are called "the government".
2. Drugs are good.
3. Abortions are awwwwwwright.
4. Social security is bad.
5. Federal government is bad, State government is good.
6. Pedophilia is good.
7. Guns are totally good, unless used by the government and it's contractors.
8. Homosexuality is good but gay marriage is not good because it'll be legalized by the evil, nasty government.
9. The death penalty is bad (but only if it's carried out by the government)
10. The free market is the ultimate good.
11. People who say they are conservative but are really Republicans are "neocon" liars.
12. People who say they are liberal but are really Democrats are "socialist" liars.
13. Privatization is good.
14. Unions are bad.
15. Smoking is good. Tobacco companies are friends.
16. Ayn Rand is God (though she hates libertarians, but hey, who doesn't?)
17. Believe that Franklin Delano Roosevelt was a bloodthirsty tyrant but Ronald Reagan is God.
18. Somalia is the best country on earth
19. The mailman is a government employee and must be gunned down with an AK-47 for setting foot on your property.
20. Ron Paul is god, Bob Barr is a fake libertarian fuckwit.
21. Wearing seatbelts is bad.
22. Paying taxes is a sin, unless those taxes go in to making video games like America's Army.
23. Agnosticism is good because religions and atheism are too altruistic and therefore hamper capitalism.
24. The Democrats and Republicans don't have our best interest at heart but conglomerates do!
25. The only honorable way to die is in a shootout with the cops.
26. Paying taxes to the government is bad. Paying utilities to companies is sexy.
27. Traffic lights are bad because they're social engineering.
28. Health inspectors are bad because they allow people who are too stupid and lazy to investigate every restaurant and store they go to survive.
29. Worship capitalism as the only freedom loving philosophy but refuse to pay for stuff, because open source is the ONLY way!
30. No business would ever desire increased government power. Halliburton who?
31. Police do not have the right to stop a parent from killing their kid, but the cops need to be involved when a baby boy is getting circumcised!
32. Outlawing spam e-mail is a grave threat to liberty.
33. The Constitution and the Bill of Rights are infallible, and amendments are bad (especially the 14th and 16th).
34. Democracy is evil because America is only a republic!
35. The best way to respect individuality is to let those who are useless to society starve to death.
36. If you cast a shadow on someone else's lawn, you're trespassing.
37. If a plane flies over your house, they're trespassing. (Seriously, look it up).
38. It's okay to eat babies so long as they're your own kids.
39. Taxation is theft. Charging rent is not.
40. The genius of the free market is that both the rich and poor get the choice of paying for expensive health care or dying.
41. You must remain perfectly silent any time someone else is nearby because forcing someone else's eardrums to vibrate violates the non-aggression principle.
42. Price gouging is awesome! Don't like it? Then move to Russia, you commie!

[Mitgard]

He's so much more exciting than a common politician,
Inequities will vanish when he hollers "Competition!"

[Erwinvds]

Oorspronkelijk geplaatst door Dope

http://encyclopediadramatica.com/

Love it.
Dit komt echt in mijn favorieten.
Grof gebekt, maar het slaat wel de nagel op de kop.

[Jazeker]

Oorspronkelijk geplaatst door Erwinvds

Love it.
Dit komt echt in mijn favorieten.
Grof gebekt, maar het slaat wel de nagel op de kop.

zattevrienden.be in het Engels en met wat meer rake manier van commentaar.

[liberalist_NL]

Van dezelfde site:

The Netherlands is a low-lying country that has slowly been legalizing everything for the last 100 years. As of today you can purchase sex from Macedonian women, marry someone of the same sex, use controlled substances and kill your Grandma. However, you may not shove people, forget to tip your hat or steal bicycles. Do not confuse them with the Danish. They also have tulips. Also, sex with animals used to be OK if the animal didn't protest but was made illegal in 2008.
The combination of the dumbass people, its craplike geography and the lack of epic lulz have earned the Netherlands the title of: Asshole of Europe (and the world).
The vast majority of the population in the Netherlands are Dutch people, who are the descendents of Germans who performed anal sex with pigs and Giraffes. While the Dutch were once invaded by their inferiority complex-suffering neighbors Germany, they take it rather well and don't whine too much and say it hurts. They are also known as being a bit OCD by other dirty Europeans (also known as the French) because they bathe regularly.

[liberalist_NL]

Germany or Almanya Federal Cumhuriyeti, is a country in the middle of Eurabia and is also the World Headquarters of the Michael Richards Fanbase. It was founded in 1999 to supply Europe with queers and shit music, in an attempt to compete with San Francisco in Amerikkka. Since then it has been a total camwhore and everyone fucking hates it.
Ethnic Germans are Sick fucks.
One must realize that all Germans are Nazis and kill Jews for lulz. All Germans will claim that they were in Austria during the war and will lie about everything, even if it isn't needed.

[liberalist_NL]

Arabs (pronounced Ay-rabs) are the byproduct of unprotected anal sex. Arabs primarily inhabit the Middle East, North Africa, Michigan, Taxi Cabs, Guantanamo Bay and generally wherever there is a horrible odor.
Arabs may also be referred to as: camel jockeys, durka durkas, ragheads, towelheads, dune coons, sand niggers (the scientific term) and oil niggers. There is, however, no reason to ever use any of these names, since Arab itself is an offensive term.
Quite a lot of the Sand Niggers live in America, where they work in 7-11s. Most American Arabs (more than 90%) are terrorists and support jihad. The other 10% are children (sand niglets) below consensual age (less than eleven years old) and not allowed to become terrorists just yet. Recently there has been an influx to the southern half of Italy as well, where they attempt to pass themselves off as Wops due to their similar greasy brown skin, bent noses & crap accent. This generally fools the natives, and as a result interbreeding often occurs.
Arab hobbies include blowing up airplanes, buildings, subways, Americans, Jews and getting flash-fried in transformer boxes whilst evading the police (Jew York Times confirms). They also like to drive taxi cabs and own 7/11s.

[Firestone]

Een soort politics.be, maar dan om te lachen ...

[Public energy]

Oorspronkelijk geplaatst door liberalist_NL

Israel (Hebrew: ישראל Arabic: فلسطين‎ ) is an illegal settlement of jews in the Middle East. As the USA's 51st state, Israel (aka The Promised Land and Zionistan) is Murka's BFF in an otherwise hostile Moslem sandnigger infested region of the world.

Founded after World War 2 by Britfag trolls eager to unload the worthless sandbox they owned from prior world domination, the idea was to placate Hitler's leftover butthurt whiners by giving them their own country. The plans also included putting them in a 'bad neighbourhood' where -it was hoped- like niggers in a Georgia trailer park, they would be easily plucked out and lynched from Burning Bushes.

Unfortunately, the worthless dump was already occupied with its native population, the Palestinians. And they'd put a fair amount of work into the dump. So when all these pesky Jews got off the Führer Fun Bus and started throwing their weight around like they owned the joint, claiming it had been promised to them way before the Holocaust in an old work of fiction called The Bible, the natives grew restless and started pushing back. Since the jews had come bearing arms instead of the customary Arabic gift of alms, shit started jumping off.